we could have had it all

salam everyone.

it is 2o'clock in the morning here.i just woke up.you know i have to right?pathology practical due tomorrow.oh wait!few more hours.just few more hours!pheww.i'm dead.

yesterday i spent my precious time by doing thing i regretted.i edited few photos.first of all,i am no pro.secondly,i have no dslr or whatsoever guys with up-to-date technologies have.and i am far away from knowing how to capture great photos.

i did these out of boredom. don't criticize . T.T

doakan patho sy esok ok.sy mcm banyak xbace patho lagi.aritu theory pon banyak tinggalkan.so skang nanges pon xgune da.ulala~

i am in a bad shape,full stop

usah mengharapkan kesenangan..
dalam perjuangan penuh pengorbanan..
enough said.




tak sabar nak balik rumah.

mata ni xbenti2 rase nak nangis.rase nak jerit kuat2 bagi semua orang tau.tapi what's the point?it is pointless anyway.most people are actually glad to hear your problems,they say.minority do really care,but most,just kinda glad you have them.so yeah.there's absolute zero point in crying,mourning,screaming your lungs out.i guess being strong is what keeping me together.i am strong.i am.i just need to convince myself that i am strong enough to manage everything on my own,stand on my own two feet.i don't need others' feet to stand on to.i am heavy in case you haven't noticed.your legs gonna be in grievous hurt if you let me stand on your feet.you know what?i kinda dislike myself right now.i don't know.everything just seems to be,hurm,how shall i put this..ha.everything seems to be in a mess.my head is a mess.my mind is a mess.everything-is-a-mess.

i have like 4 more days if i still have math mind,neglecting mathematics all the way from your high school till now is kinda sucked.i can't even do a simple math.HATE IT. 

anakku sazali dengarlah..~ jozan maharaja lawak mnggu ke due.

ZIZAN FOREVER.
 ha-ha. 

on the floor

errrkk.post gambar sendiri,AGAIN.

peach ice tea.way overpriced,baby.

what's going on?

as salam semua.

just finished with theory exams, phewh, felt a lil relieved but not really. practicals await.
i am sooooo gonna do the hand jive.please let me do it and be gedik for one moment.sebab arini kepale rase nak pecah and other than pikir pasal exam tadi,i have nothing else left to wonder.

asida is so mad about all the talkings regarding the stupidest israel.well who don't?their boneless tongues are so pathetically stupid. they swore things they weren't able to keep! they act like they are the most powerful people in the planet,but believe me,you guys are just stupid with all your stupid missions. plain stupid.
pray for our brothers and sisters in Gaza.hold on to Allah's promises.hold on to your humanity. peace will come to you soon.insyaAllah.our prayers are with you brothers and sisters.may serenity,peace,clarity be with you guys.kuat lah.bersabar lah.kami mendoakan kamu.insyaAllah.

mr. incredible

meet my mr. incredible :

peace yo.

post kosong

as salam.

penat gilos arini.penat sepenat penatnye. skang rindu sume bende yg kt msia. tak saba nak balik.hoyeah

appreciate what you have before it's too late,they say.hah indeed.semua orang pon tau kan?it's just that sometimes we take matters for granted.we simply don't care that much.when we lose interest on something,or *someone might i add?* ,we just play the ignorant part,where we pretend we don' care,where we act like nothing had ever happened.hidup kan macam roda orang cakap,one second you are at the top,the next,you just one feet away from the ground..disappointed arini sebab da rase macam soalan tu akan masok tapi what i did is nothing..tapi takde la nak blame diri sendiri sebab memang da takde rezeki tak dapat nak jawab.i did try my best,but if 'my best' is not THE best,so i'll try harder.i promise.

don't make excuses pal.excuses are just meaningless you know.if something just get in your way,just set them aside.jangan kita lari dari masalah.kite cope dgn masalah.running just won't do u any good.masalah kejar jugak anyway.so if something bugs you,selesaikan lah.or tell someone.or if taknak bagitau orang,try la selesaikan care sendiri.janganlah kite risau.Allah sentiase ade..

tata

kalah

salam.

kali ni rase mcm harapan makin tipis.nak percaye ke tak ikut suke.memang ayat 'ala trok gile' mcm trademark bile exam.tapi siyes,kali ni diri sendri pon yakin memang mcm tak mampu. T.T

sebab ny,baru skang nak start study.

i am afraid of failing,i guess.at some point,we are all afraid right?


berlalulah harapan dengan angin.

terpakse lah mengaku kesilapan diri sendiri.

so if in case i fail,jangan marah okay! T.T

i am doomed.

can i take 2 minutes off?
i need to respire effectively.i need to cut lose of everything.i have to relax and chill a bit.
my hands and feet are sweating like crazy!i can't even hold a pencil.my stomach has butterflies wandering around,flying all the way through my colon.my head are too packed with stupid stuffs.not to forget,my depression level is way too high.

i have way too much chapters to cover and the thought of it is killing me.seriously.it is an utterly horrifying situation i am currently in.

i have stomach ache but don't have the urge to go to toilet.i have headache but don't feel to be relieved by sleeping.my eyes are heavy but my head is reluctant to fell asleep.i have migraine but don't feel like taking any medication.my body is shivering but hey,i am wearing socks and sweater and my fan is off.i can't think of anything else except i am under pressure.i am very damn hungry but don't feel to eat anything,at all.
WHAT AM I SUFFERING NOW?WHAT IS YOUR PROVISIONAL DIAGNOSIS?

well,if you can't tell,let me give you a clue.

MY EXAMINATION IS FREAKING TOMORROW.

so,can you tell now?


okay i am screwed.

tutup laptop plis

time to get serious baby.

serious ke klu smpat tulis blog lagi?

this is the perfect medium i guess.my self-confidence just go *whooosssh down,just like that.

forever jozan

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v2p1VJVuw5I


haih.nak pecah perut gelak tengok diorang.well,walau duduk dalam gua cane pon,tetap sokong diorang.

JOZAN FOREVER!

aik?berblog blog lagi?exam la!

as-salam everyone and good night to whoever stay in india and good day all.

i am relieved.after everything,i am relieved.much better now.alhamdulillah.i guess there's no harm in speaking the truth right?and there's nothing to lose when you express yourself,oh,maybe you lose your pride a little,but it's for the better..

kalau kite stress,kite jgn pikir yg kite stress.trust me,being stressful is NO fun.and if you feel like breaking,you should hold on to whatever strength you have left.you have come this far,don't stop now.right?and kalau kita marah,jangan layan rase marah tu.marah tu evil.haha.sbb marah la kite marah orang lain,dan sebab marah orang lain la orang lain marah kita dan marah orang lain jugak,dan orang lain jugak tu marah orang lain lian jugak and okay,u get my point right?kalau kite marah kan,kita senyum je,sabar simpan dalam hati.Allah kan ada.you breath,Allah is there.you eat,Allah is there.you sleep,Allah is there.whatever you do,Allah is there.

arini kannnnn,asek rase nak tidoooo je keje..oh kadang2 kite kan,nasihat orang pandai,pastu bile diri sendiri yang kene,nasihat sendiri pon terbang ntah ke mane.hahaha.so pasni nak try dengar nasihat sendiri jugak!hahah.

nak balik da.kih2.da nak start kemas beg now.hihiih.miss you ibu ayah dani nina along aiman faris!miss miss miss! *hugs and kisses*

ulala.what's not to love?

indeed people,indeed.


and now i am taking my chance of being destructed by exam's stress.haha.what the fish?

microbiology is killing me u know.the others just waiting to kill me.they are killing me softly.

i am heart broken.bye.

bergambar-gambaran

 my default picture on facebook

 my whatsapp profile pic

still deciding nak upload ke tak.hihi

habes memory card kak atol da banyak gamba saye.hihi..sida kate 'tu la kak atol.kamera sy pon habes penuh ngn gamba die'.

muahahhaahahhaahhaha

people forget

you know how sad it is?i mean,how easy people forget,it is sad,right?
life ain't easy.and no matter how life knocks you down,you just have to get back up.
you cannot just simply commit a suicide you know what i mean?

while i am sitting on my chair,TRYING hard to focus on my study,i just couldn't stop thinking of how nice it is to be home.how awesome it is to be with your love ones.i won't mourn over my sadness,it's just that i get distracted too often.and it seems like you have to be tough on your own coz no one will listen.if they ever listen,they'll never understand.sorry.i guess i am disappointed.

i am at my breaking point

dalam fikiran, ade satu je..NAK BALIK.
sangat2.i guess everything will be better once i am home.i will be free from all the stress that preventing me from keeping it together.exams,the firecrackers sound which was mind blowing and head bursting,the very comfy bed which is too attractive,the junkies which are too tempting.everything just make me kinda losing my mind.i wanna go home badly.be with ibu ayah danial and everyone else.
i am strong in case you haven't noticed.minus the migraine and the sengal2 badan,i am perfect.or i was.i will be feeling better insyaAllah.the attempt to be calm all the time and won't break down,well,i am playing it can you see?tersangattttttttttttt lah nak balik.sabarlah wahai hati.sabar lah.sikit je lagi.sikit je.that's what i've been telling myself.sikit je lagi.nak ibu sangat2.i need her hug.and her kiss.i want to be with her at all times.i want her to embrace me and never let me go.

i haven't talk to danial in a long time now.last i heard he was in port dickson having a vacation or something in which mom couldn't participate because she had works to do.haven't heard about nina also this morning and i am pretty sure she's enjoying her holiday to the max.and like she always does,i have no doubt in saying she bullies danial everyday for sure.

i miss everyone so much right now.so much.so much.so much.may i repeat it for zillion times? T.T

sebiru hari ini

ade lagi gambar nak upload,tapi ni je yg da transfer kat laptop.yang laen sume kat hp lagi..

yeay sume kene pakse tangkap gambar depan cermin.hihi

being ayu is kinda my thing now

salam.

okay don't let me fool you guys.don't believe my title!i am not ayu,AT ALL.trust me.

but to prove that i was trying to be one,here :

truthfully,i like my pink Al-quran my usrah-mate gave asida and me.mine is pink in colour.and asida's too.well,glad to have usrah-mates who understand you lots..

you know what?sometimes i often forget.i forget to remind myself what's the purpose of me being here,standing on this world.we had an ISK last time which totally kept me on track.we ARE here because of one motive.and sometimes,in the nick of time we forget to just do one great deed.like i put up on my facebook status,don't you think it's such a waste kalau xwat baik even in a split second?just breath and do nothing.waste people.waste.

kadang2 rase macam diri tu busy manjang.macam banyak sangat keje nak kene wat.padahal everyone gets 24 hours a day.no one get 25 hours like they mentioned in those stupid love songs.no!we are all even.24hours a day.and one just cannot be busier than other.we are all the same!it is the matter of management,on how we manage things,on how we manage our time.everything depends on us.you nak ke tak nak.ye atau tak.may i say it's objective.nak wat ke tak nak wat.no middle.just yes or no.

oh.i hate myself for being such a lazy woman.wake up!

bile exam menjelma

6 more days people.
6!
six!
SIX!
and now,i am SICK!

exam IS stressful.it's easy to comfort others when they are having exams,tapi bile kene kat batang hidung sendiri,dush,it's hard man.yeah,HARD.

bosann sangat

as-salam everyone.

oh well,actually i just woke up from my overdose sleep.i am not infected by trypanoma if you might ask.still,i have sleeping disorder.it's not beauty sleep no more.shush now.i pity myself.yup.i really do.
i have been counting days you know.not for examination.nah.i HATE exams.i am counting for days to go back home.it surprised me to have affinity to be happy to go back than to be afraid of exam which is in,like A WEEK? T.T

sebenarnye xde idea pon nak tulis ape.tp seriously rase nak tap keyboard sebab bosannnnnn!!! haahha
i am thinking of buying a new pair of shoes like the one nina has,and a new handbag which i wanted to buy long long time ago but due to i have too much of them,EVERYBODY forbids me to do so,but well,not this time peeps,i WILL buy one.insyaAllah. :) and baju,hurm,i think i have enough of them.you know there's a lot of bajus i haven't even wear yet.satu sebab rase mcm da ketat,due sebab mcm xsesuai nak pakai,tige sbb malas nak gosok tudung that match the baju.so yes.bia jela terperuk dlm almari dulu.hihiih.and ibu will kill me if i buy more baju..nak beli jam baru!! T.T tapi,da xde duet.uwaaaaaaaaa.. i really have my head over heels over the fossil watch with all the blink-ies around the watch.oh im in love..and there's one more i surveyed last time,Guess one,but i voted for fossil first.tak pela.bia jadi harapan je.sebab diorang will utterly tentang if i buy a new watch. :'(

okay la makin bosan da,bye

mood swings

i'm all stressed up and messed up and fed up.
can you see? T.T

decision decision.

life is cruel,sometimes.

oh,as salam semua.how was your day?

being a childish and irrelevant is not the kinda person i want to be now,or even in the future.i am 22 for God sake!i need to have the power to make good choices,to bring myself to a great term,to be able to make decisions,and to be able to walk away from whatever or whoever is stopping me from moving on.yeah,that's a lot of wishes.dream on girl.dream on.

like mom said,one day,i am going to be a wife,who's gonna take great care of a loving husband,(ok nak jadi isteri solehah.ameen),and later afterwards,i am going to become a mother to i-don't-know-how-many-kids-i am-going-to-have,and i want to be the best mother in the entire world.i want to have a family under Allah's guidance and under His blessings all the time.i sounded mature i know,well,didn't loose anything for hoping right?they say what we say or what we speak is like a du'a.so is we say something good like 'i am a talented person',it's a du'a.so,say something nice to others.

ainina upload ONE PHOTO PER DAY. ONE. REALLY? that stingy huh?
fine.we'll see what you are going to get when you are abroad and i'm home.WE'LL SEE.
hahahha.and fyi,i don't really need your photo.YOUR photo.i just need danial's.thank you.haha


i am so sleepy now.i think i better be off.

i am rational

salam a'laik.

i have no other option i think..to let go is hard.no,rather,it is friggin' damn hard.huh.
well,they say you'll never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have left.
everyone is strong.not as strong as superman and superman really don't exist for God sake,but i guess you got my point.even when you cry a river,you still are strong.

and i am too worried of my examination because i show NO progress,AT ALL.
but who am i to complain?not that everyone would lend me their ears and hear me complain.so i just have to be terrified alone,by myself,like i usually did.oh wait.i bugged people last time,but i am trying to be more matured now.i guess by bringing myself to a more mature term does help, tit bits.it's okay.we all have Allah to listen to.he is nearer than our carotids remember?

i score a lot in membebel.and trying to be a good friend and all.but,i have no idea what will happen to my entire life.the road i've taken so far,the correct one?what is going to happen in the next,one second?i will never know.only Allah does..so let's just strive to be a better muslim each and everyday.don't worry too much.don't be too self concerned.don't be too judge-y on yourself.don't condemned yourself too much.self motivation,yes.condemnation,no.

yeah.let's just say,my emotions are hightened because of exam stress.my emotions are all over the place.i don't know i can keep up my good happy face for how long,but i'll try my best not to crack under pressure.or not to bang my head so hard on the wall.i need my brain for exam.i need an intact skull cavity.


pray for a better future.well,life is like a watermelon.when you have it,you hope you'll have a super awesome one,the red flesh with sweet taste,to indulge during hot sunny day.but you'll never know how the inside is,and you just have to TRY to pick a 'you-think-it's-nice-one' watermelon.so just live your life.you'll never know what will happen.just pray,and try.who knows you'll have a sweet one like a red-sweet-watermelon right?
okay.i am hungry. sigh

nitey.

self obsession

salam a'laik.

no.the title is not for me.NO NO.haha

dani

salam alaik.

ainina has arrived home yesterday around 5 am if aina didn't tell the info wrong.she straight away woke danial up like she always did.i think danial should get use to that.let's hope the kid can live happily and calmly with that clumsy nina.well,we'll see about that.last time she's home,she taught the cutie pie how to do a chicken dance. -_-''


nak tunjuk gamba dani kat ofis ibu.i saved from ibu wall photos,or timeline photos they called it?okay whatever.none of it matters.tengok gmb dani :

tehehehe

salam mates.
i just saw my friend posted on facebook this 'when nothing goes right......go left' and i laughed hard.
well i guess i haven't got any fun this week.normal plain fun,yes.real fun,nope.i guess i could blame exam which is around the corner,and by that i mean,REALLY near the corner.sigh.i couldn't do much since i have been playing and goofing around way before,so i might have to bear the consequences right.

i am a great observant you know.n i kinda have the ability to read peoples' mind sometimes.ha ha.no i am not joking.i have a basic instinct which kinda helps,a lot.oh sorry.i would rather say i can read what people feel instead of peoples' mind.i am no robert pattinson.though i cannot compel people like damon or stefan or elena(lately) do,i can persuade people,which i must say,is selfish.i have this compulsive disorder,not in the psychiatric way,just the normal-regular-people way.for example,when people say no when i want them to say yes,i will stay and fight for my 'yes' and later due to malas nak layan me,they will turn out to say 'yes'.SELFISH.i know.i am such a pain in the,hurm,gluteus max.i guess asida suffers a lot in that department.she could barely say no because,well,like i mentioned,i am such a pain in the tut.

'yanial.yanial da mamam ke belom'-me
'blommm'-dani
'yanial.mama mane mama?'-me,again
'work'-dani,again

miss u mucho kid!

balik rumah.whee~

salam mates.

know what? da beli da tiket! hihi. alhamdulillah. moga2 ni la keputusan terbaek. moga2 dapat la study kat rumah. ameen ameen ameen!